Added: Shelena Faison - Date: 12.09.2021 13:16 - Views: 22950 - Clicks: 6970
Falling in love with someone, sharing yourselves and experiences together creates the most powerful memories. Truth is everybody is going to hurt you: you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for. Love is never a safe exchange. The main ingredient of love is vulnerability. Only when we allow ourselves to be vulnerable with someone else we become open to love.
Knowing that we might be hurt or rejected should not stop us for offering love. Love rewards only the brave ones, the ones who can accept that suffering can be part of the deal when it comes to love. The people who are most worthy of our love are also those who are worth our risk. When someone loves you, the way they talk about you is different. You feel safe and comfortable. In the eyes of the person who loves us we are our greatest version. The eyes that love are always caring, forgiving, and admiring.
We talk differently about those we love because we put emotion in every word. In love, communication has two layers that intertwine — a layer of meaning and one of emotion. The person who loves builds a sanctuary around the loved ones in which there is safety, protection, care, and understanding. The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed. Love and friendship are not states, rather processes in which different types of reactions happen, with or without our intent.
In a meeting of two minds and two souls, the persons discover each other bit by bit and they are able to bond through their similarities and differences. They are brought together by life to share their most inner selves and to learn from each other, to grow together so each of them can become empowered through the other. The reaction is continuous and lasts as long as their feelings and interest in each other lasts.
There is always some madness in love.
But there is also always some reason in madness. Love is irrational and no matter how much we study it, we can hardly define it or put it clearly in a pattern of rules or laws. This is the reason why love is exciting. It always works in mysterious and unpredictable ways, asking everything from us and changing our entire way of looking at life. There is no logic in love because love is in itself the most mystical experience of life. The madness that exists in love does not work well with our realistic selves, yet it is an essential type of madness, which has its own rationality outside of our power of reasoning.
If you love someone, set them free. A love in which we lose our personality and our own individuality is not a fulfilling love. Love should not be an annihilation of who we are but a growth in which we add new and new layers to our identity, without actually mutilating it.
When we really love, we learn to feel free in the presence of the other. If we think of freedom as an escape then our love is a prison in disguise which can only harm us. Courage means to keep working a relationship, to continue seeking solutions to difficult problems, and to stay focused during stressful periods. There is a type of mental strength without which we cannot realize anything.
As mysteriously as love works, a relationship is a different matter. Relationships take great courage and strength because they are a work in progress, almost a project. The project of love like any other encounters obstacles and difficulties and creates a lot of stress for those involved, yet the rewards make every effort worthy it.
We use words to communicate because it seems simple, yet language is deceiving.
Language only conveys as much truth as the person who uses it wants to. No matter how truthful we use words, our expression and our body language always speak the truth. Through our eyes we say more than our words will ever do, even if we would be poets. In our eyes lay all the emotions that escape common language and every truth we try to hide. Love always has a powerful autonomy. We cannot decide who we love and we cannot decide who loves us.
Moreover, we cannot demand love and we cannot give it on request. A real love emerges naturally and organically and develops in the same way. It finds us miraculously, sometimes when we least expect it. Love comes to us in different ways and not on the same path where we are searching for it.
The best kind of love comes to us as a gift. I believe everyone has a soul mate that they can spend the rest of their life together. When we struggle to find love we might become hopeless. There are so many people in the world, how are we going to find the best person for us?
The fact that there are so many people with so many different personalities should actually encourage us. Among millions of people it is impossible to not find great compatibility with someone. We are all unique individuals but our personalities complement each other in amazing ways. When we found someone who completes us in the most definite way we can be sure that person is a soul mate. For a long and lasting relationship, lovers should foremost be best friends. Friendship lays a foundation of common goals, ideas, and preferences, of trust and confidence, and of real compatibility that goes behind the physical attraction.
A love made of friendship and passion becomes a solid formation and only this kind of love can ensure a happy marriage. A husband and a wife are not just lovers. They are partners who have to share the good and the bad. In times of crisis, friendship is more effective than love.
When dealing with people, remember you are not dealing with creatures of logic, but creatures of emotion. We can never say how much our mind determines who we are and how much does our soul. We are an intermingling of thoughts, ideas, and emotions.
Our main connection to other people and to the root of life itself is always emotional. We cannot think of our lives in terms of logical procedures and connections, because life is unpredictable, we are unpredictable, and we never have all the information we need for rational decisions. We decide with our heart, as a powerful guide who knows exactly what is essential for us, despite the logical, pragmatic constructions of the mind. Three things in human life are important: the first is to be kind; the second is to be kind; and the third is to be kind. In our societies, we strive relentlessly towards power, success, and accumulation of resources.
We forget to be there for others, yet we expect others to save us in our hard times. Besides everything that happens in the world, the real link that brings people together and that creates lasting connections and meaningful moments in existence is kindness. Being kind means being brave enough to break the mould of selfishness Seeking not only a best friend but a partner separates people and doing it over and over again, as an imperative of our soul. We all have our quirks and peculiarities and one of the most satisfying feelings in the world is finding someone who shares the exact same quirks with us, who finds them funny, or who at least does not consider them a deal-breaker.
Only with such a person we can develop real intimacy, in which vulnerability and honesty go hand in hand. We cannot put labels or limits on love and we definitely cannot measure it, like it could be a random commodity. Love travels freely, on a continuous flow, according to the desire of our hearts.
We cannot compare the love we give with the love we receive, because love is not an exact exchange, neither a fair one sometimes. Love pours freely and intensely until it consumes itself and real love does not ask for anything in return except the freedom to flow freely. You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back. More daunting than losing our love is the regret of never having loved.
Love comes and goes at its own will from our lives, it comes to change us, to give us hope, to make us grow, to allow us to connect deeply with another being, and to put us face to face with an incredible array of new emotions and sensations.
By closing our hearts to love we hide ourselves in a comfort zone where nothing can grow or flourish. Nothing is perfect. Life is messy. Relationships are complex. Outcomes are uncertain. People are irrational. Life is a series of unpredictable events united with our constant attempts of controlling these events and make sense of them.
Our imagination is our worst enemy because we fabricate in our minds perfect versions of life, of ourselves, and of our relationships only to have life do her own thing, despite our plans. Our power to control our lives is in same points minimal. We can hardly know fully the insides of our own personalities and even our behaviour appears unpredictable to us sometimes. Just going with the flow saves us many headaches. Friendship may, and often does, grow into love, but love never subsides into friendship. Many times love grows naturally out of friendship in a very smooth way that allows both friendship and love to coexist in a happy and meaningful relationship.
At the same time, love can never grow into friendship. Love burns and consumes us completely and when love fades, we can hardly find in us the resources necessary to kindle a different, more serene feeling. People who loved each other but who are no longer lovers prefer to be strangers and to cut all ties, than to be friends and have to keep the wound open all the time. Forgiveness is not something we do, but something that is given to us.
We have wronged someone and we ask them to forgive us. The forgiveness happens only when they want to. Forgiveness is a mutual decision to restore a relationship back to a moment when nothing infringed upon it.Seeking not only a best friend but a partner
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